Alex Biles / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 10: Allen Iverson is Broke (Alex Biles)

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Question for “The Answer”: What in the hell?

Allen Iverson, who reportedly earned more than $200 million during his tumultuous career, is officially broke.

Let’s not get on the guy for being relegated to play basketball in Turkey or Puerto Rico. Don’t harp on the $859,896.46 he currently owes a Georgia jeweler, either. Let’s piece together out how “A.I” got to this point and remedy the situation. Ahh, there we go:

Perhaps the telltale indicator of Iverson’s divorce from financial reality, however, was an anecdote I received via a former teammate of Iverson’s from his days with the Philadelphia 76ers. This player, raised on a far higher standard of fiduciary responsibility, was amused and stunned by “A.I.’s” money habits. He related how on many road trips Iverson refused to carry baggage, evidently seeking to remain as unencumbered from physical things as he was of basketball defenders. Because of this habit, Iverson would buy a full selection of new clothes, shoes, and other expensive items at each new destination with rolls of cash he carried on his person. Moreover, upon departure, he would leave all those goodies behind in his hotel room or just give them away.

No, there wouldn’t be a point in hiring a bum off the streets to carry around Iverson’s baggage for a measly $30,000 a year. Not when pissing comes this easy. Luckily for “A.I.”, there are options in 2012, including a grand return to football… err fútbol:

The Rochester Lancers of the Major Indoor Soccer League issued a press release on Saturday saying it will offer Iverson $20,000 per game to play in its two remaining home games this season. Plus, Iverson would receive a $5,000 bonus for every goal he scores.

Just 168 goals away from paying off that bling!

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