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Alex Biles / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 4: Vice President Joe Biden Doesn’t Know Who Van Jones Is (Alex Biles)

While Joe Biden hasn’t shot anybody in the face lately, the 68-year-old has granted us a fair share of good ol’ vice presidential gaffes. Earlier this month, in a radio interview, he was asked about Van Jones, 9/11 truther and former “green jobs czar” for the Obama Administration. That is, a former member of the executive branch … Continue reading

Alex Biles / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 5: The Chronicles of Phoenix Jones (Alex Biles)

Once upon a time, stood a masked crusader who made it his merry mission to neutralize the various villains nagging his neighbors. We’re talking about Seattle’s Phoenix Jones, of course, real-life crime-fighting extraordinaire and de facto leader of the Rain City Superhero Movement. In McGruffian fashion, he has taken to the streets of his neighborhood … Continue reading

Alex Biles / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 6: Freedom-Loving Ritch Workman Wants to Legalize Dwarf Tossing (Alex Biles)

Poor Ritch Workman. Things just aren’t the way they used to be. Long gone is the heyday of freedom, when a determined American could actually be somebody in this country, like a Polio researcher, typewriter repairman or Daschund jockey. Or let’s just randomly say, a dwarf tosser. Yep, you heard right. State Rep. Ritch Workman (R-FL) has introduced legislation to … Continue reading

Paul Notice / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 7: Oscar Ramiro Ortega, Indestructable Assassin? (Paul Notice)

Around 11:15am, NPR correspondent Mark Memmot reported an escalation in the manhunt for a 21-year-old by the name of Oscar Ramiro Ortega in the D.C. area. Authorities suspect Ortega to be responsible for shots fired around 9:30pm at the White House. Bullets were found on the grounds outside the building, but nothing was able to penetrate the glass. Authorities … Continue reading

Leslie Britton / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 8: So You Want to Run for President? (Leslie Britton)

If you’ve ever dreamed of running for president, I hope you have your crazy pants ready. With the riveting South Carolina primary quickly approaching, and another wackjob legitimate candidate out of the race, it is quite necessary to take a break from the patriotic rhetoric and take a look at the lengthy qualifications and hard line stances … Continue reading

Alex Biles / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 9: The Hypocrisy Behind the Clint Eastwood Chrysler Commercial (Alex Biles)

We know Clint Eastwood is quick to tell a stranger to “get off his lawn” — that is, unless the stranger happens to be carrying a bag with a dollar sign. The interwebs are buzzing about Eastwood’s appearance in the second Super Bowl installment of Chrysler’s “Imported from Detroit” advertisements. The two-minute number, which features the roughly … Continue reading

E.Y. Lee / Uncategorized

Cheap Shots No. 11: Justin Bieber Gifted a $100,000 Luxury Electric Car for 18th Birthday (E.Y. Lee)

Flickr Creative Commons // Fisker Auto After I made the egregious mistake of crawling out underneath my rock, I learned that teen pop sensation Justin Bieber was recently gifted a 2012 Fisker Karma, a luxury electric vehicle worth approximately $100,000, for his eighteenth birthday earlier this month. Scott “Scooter” Braun, his manager, surprised him with the extravagant gift … Continue reading